Evo @ 11

In which we discuss the award #evfn won, other social meetups and how magnets are not the best nose decoration.

Choice Bits

• Low expectations
• New Times Best of Phoenix Tweet-Ups for #evfn
• More #evfn hassles
• Ford Fiesta Movement Desert Bloom music thingy
• Black Carl
• Anti-social raging hormonal bitch: Sheila, not me
• Lack of follow-through
• Someone’s going to LA again
• The rare-earth magnets vs. NJ story
• The fucking cat attacks me again. I think they’ve trained her.
• Dairy Queen!

Podcast: Download (25.9MB)

More change! This episode is recorded at a new location. More comfy! We’ll even be back on Ustream pretty soon. Can Evo make this any more convenient for HIM than doing it in his own basement?

Choice Bits

• ShEvo Studios!
• Behind the bar.
• If she wants to play with her pussy, let her play with her pussy.
• Testing a new drink: Evil Evo Contaminated Concoction is an Epic FAIL!
• My microphone is slowly heading towards the floor.
• Fuckin’ Penguins.
• Someone stole Badass Karaoke Trey’s computer.  Poor Trey.
• The Manganesque Trick.
• Evo is a nasty boy, thinkin’ nasty thoughts, but he’s not a cheap trick.
• Alice Cooper summers in Hawaii and winters in Phoenix. Just sose you know.
• Are we getting burnt out on evfn?
• I’m not really good at public speaking/sales.
• Cinnabon! Schlotzsky’s Deli is also Cinnabon, at least here.
• Again with the droopy microphone.
• Beware the blue light.
• Evo’s obscure reference to an OverHeard he tweeted. Asshole.
• Evo (representing pedophiles everywhere) thanks the producers of Toddlers and Tiaras.
• Balloon Boy. If you missed this story, don’t bother. The story is there was no story.
• We still don’t know when we’ll be doing this next. Stay tuned!

Podcast: Download (27.1MB)

I never know what to put here. We talk about empty nesting, pissing and snakes. And sexting. Are you any good at sexting, cuz I could use a few pointers.

Choice Bits

• Evo is finally getting his shit together at work.
• NJ has left the family home to go off to school… across town.
• “If you’re listening Son, don’t come home.”
• The grownups get their garage back.
• Chicks are moody bitches?
• I need to work on my sexting.
• Should we have a sex segment? A sexment?
• When you’re talking sex on twitter it’s called twatting.
• Evo’s tacky sound effects.
• Inglourious Basterds semi-discussion.
• Quentin Tarentino is dawg ugly but a brilliant movie maker.
• District 9 semi-discussion.
• “Stop fucking thinking about it. It was a movie about killin’ Natzies!”
• Halloween II?
• Zombieland. Sounds like fun!
• NJ says some movie is not really a chick flick but we don’t know which one it is.
• “We can just fuck all weekend.”
• “I don’t like having my weather with adjectives.”
• Ted Kennedy died.
• Hunchbacks pissing in a trough.
• More about outdoor urinals than you ever wanted to know.
• She’s not peeing in the pool.
• Promo for The Good Parts, an erotica podcast.
• We now have two snakes, Ares and Xena.
• The bell rang, we’re done.
• It doesn’t say Evo-Sheila-Debbie at 11.

(Well damnit, the actual media was there on the first save but somewhere in my editing it disappeared. Let’s try this again.)

****

Technical difficulties, just download THIS until smarter people than me can fix it.

Podcast: Download (24.8MB)

Debbie loves making new promos. So… another one! And since I was out of things to talk about, I asked Sunny Thaper to join us. And that’s always a good time. Every 18 episodes, we’ll bring you Sunny. And Sunny knocks out the outro for us!

Choice Bits

• We’re on vacation the next two weeks, so listen to this 3 times.
• You know what else works? Being brown.
• What do you use to keep the monkeys away from you?
• In India, our mosquitoes attack other smaller mosquitoes
• If you’re not canoeing into work, it’s not a monsoon
• I have been putting fake porn pictures of you up on the Internet
• I’m not sure RLS is on the same level as Dengue Virus
• Maybe they cut out her perspective during one of her brain surgeries
• Speaking of super abilities…
• I don’t recall what you said. Was I listening?
• I’m pissed off at Vs today
• Superheroes vs Supervillains fight Saturday, June 27th at 6:30. Come out!
• What is your superhero name, Sometimes Disabled Boy?
• Wait, you’re Indian. You know how to levitate.
• Sunny could be Sasquatch or Captain Caveman.
• You guys are being wacky in costumes while I’m singled out as the terrorist
• If you have to say “Is it offensive?”, it probably is
• He’ll bitch-slap you four times with one move
• That looks like an upside-down penis
• She could be Super Blame-Deflecting Girl
• The strip bars never close
• You and your girlfriend got ran out because they thought you were hookers
• Fanks Cj fo cookee

Podcast: Download (26.8MB)

No Sheila! But left wing nut job Dani Cutler fills in for her, bringing half of her family along — Valina and her beau Allen.

Choice Bits

• I didn’t get you pregnant
• Instead of an “APPLAUSE” light, you need a “DOUCHE” light
• Next time you wanna make a sales pitch: space uniform
• You’re not my favorite
• You surely recognize you cannot compress time
• Sign up to present at Ignite Phoenix 5
• I’m now banned from Social Media Club
• Maybe you should moon them?
• Hewn vs felled
• Should I stop being good?
• Bribery kind of invalidates the transaction
• We need an androgynous dyke for this position
• So you’re a tracer?
• Evo says you are a prostitute
• Let’s let him not fuck that up
• Fucktard is getting married on Monday
• Can you drink while you are ice skating?

Podcast: Download (28.3MB)

Recorded on my birthday. What did you get me?

Choice Bits

• Math is hard

• Apologies for last week’s show.
• You fucked my day completely
• I’m trying to piss people off on purpose
• I spent the morning being lotioned-up by a 2 year old
• I look like Nappy Dan
• They call that David Attenborough Syndrome
• Into the Dark
• I plan on showing my ass again
• If there’s no drinking involved, we won’t do it for #evfn
• Vacation for Evo @ 11 crew coming up in July
• I’m pretty sure that precludes operating heavy machinery
• Wedge that thing right between your tits and you’ll be in the perfect spot
• That’s where the phrase “anal leakage” came from
• Would it be rude for me to say perhaps your daughter is in prostitution?
• She’s a pussy-enabler

Podcast: Download (27.3MB)

Recorded live at Balticon! With Patrick E. McLean, a bottle of Macallan 12-year-old scotch, Bill DeSmedt, Sheila Dee and P.G. Holyfield. It’s long. It’s wild. Kinda like me.

Choice Bits

• Apologies for last week’s show

• But there will be no fellatio
• I jotted down show notes, but I’m not too sure I can read them
• Ding
• Evo ate a baby on the plane
• What strange shit can you say right now?
• Is there a chemist in the room?
• You may put your mouth all over my scotch
• Now I’m just the fucking errand boy
• Tommy Chong’s Waffle House
• I’m a dick
• Phil Rossi was banned from this show two years ago
• It means “nice ass” in Lat
• “How are you living a little”
• I wanna fuck you like a chemist
• I can’t deal with anything that ends in “Z”. Like the alphabet?
• The opposite of ding sounds racist, so I’m not gonna say it
• Shut up, it’s my show
• I’m sorry, four and five didn’t make it
• The good news is; I don’t care
• Holy shit I need some more field scotch
• Science Thriction?
• Just looking for a reason to hate
• But now the bitch cleans
• Has anyone in the audience done an alcohol enema?
• Ding.

Podcast: Download (33.5MB)

Debbie comes up with the best show titles. Just the three of us. Building big castles in the sky.

Choice Bits

• When committing a crime and/or having sex: do not film yourself.
• It’s not like they fucked the pig that made the pepperoni
• Sex with the Pig in the City
• Get off my lawn!
• Mur Lafferty’s inside story access to War – > heavennovel.com
• Are you a monkey fucking, hit every room and every piece of the furniture person?
• Oh there’s a candle involved all right
• It’s white shit that gets smeared on bread
• When did the Depends come in?
• The wand of Double Penetration
• Come to Podcamp AZ – November 14th & 15th. It’s free. You’ll have fun.
• Michael Vick as spokesman for Humane Society? Will Dick Cheney as spokesman for Amnesty International be next?
• I’m not any kind of model
• Could George Hrab rape a dog?

Podcast: Download (28.7MB)

From that title alone, we should win some sort of prize. And if not for that, because Jeff Moriarty shows up… and pisses all over the new Star Trek movie. Then we get really nasty towards the end.

Choice Bits

• Did you swallow my eye?

• The theory about what color his dick was
• Great title for a movie: Guys in Space
• Paramount paid Jesus to endorse it
• Now I hate the movie thanks to everything you said
• His real name is Huge Ackman
• Fucking with the in-laws: good times
• You are sick and fucking demented
• Orc husband?
• Jesus is crying on me
• Fucking #followfriday
• I liked my idea of #felatiofriday
• Technorama is coming back!
• You’ve got your pasta in a twist…
• I call him a pussy all the damned time
• Quizno’s did not pay for these spots
• Gives a whole different meaning to “secret sauce”
• She’s talking to that passed-out bitch in the corner
• Men, for some reason, want to watch women pee
• I can’t stick my vagina through a hole
• I feel better. I’ve been raunchy.

Podcast: Download (28.6MB)

The alternate title for this episode was “Puppet show and John Managan”.

Choice Bits

• Apologies for last week’s show

• P.G. tells you what you missed last week
• They want all those kids to get sick
• No, that would be the firth of fifth
• What is this “we” shit? You got a mouse in your pocket?
• You’re stepping on my toes
• Post-gun check but pre-drinking
• I wanna fuck your livestock like an animal
• I do an impersonation of John Denver
• My audience is numerically challenged
• What does a live pan look like?
• The exact opposite of puking is gurgitating
• This conversation is very vealing
• Is that a verb involving Steve Eley?
• Penny beers are worth… pennies
• She’s really nice. I’m not sure what to do.
• I don’t give a frog’s fat ass what the clock says

Podcast: Download (25.5MB)