Evo @ 11

We have a do-over here. You know, new equipment + alcohol = clusterfuck. Its all good though. Visited by our east coast friend Donna and y’all remember Arioch, we’re ramping up for the HallowEvo*Con the following night.

Oh yeah, there’s a new intro!

Choice Bits

• Bethlehem PA, home of the horse cocks and not Raven-Symoné.
• If you’d been in the live stream, you’d have heard our first attempt.
• Maybe that cool martini glass rack hanging from the ceiling isn’t such a great idea.
• We love MsInformation.
• Not an overheard, by the way.
• I’d tap that.
• He’s the wholesale foreigner.
• How does the losing team like the British or Portuguese rewrite their history books?
• George Hrab should really listen to this episode and scream the answers.
• A moment for JC Hutchins, 7th Son: Descent is finally out and available. Go buy a few!
• And of course, any conversation about writers turns to Scott Sigler.
• She and E dropping in on A in San Diego next week. Let’s hope she’s prepared.
• GaryVee crossed the line stealing Sheila’s wine and cereal idea.

Podcast: Download (25.0MB)

Back at GangplankHQ for the night, we chat about nothing really important. I still don’t understand how we have over 800 followers.

Choice Bits

• Lots o’ loogies
• Donut extravaganza topped off by Jack in the Crack
• No actual nuts were chewed during the making of this podcast.
• Why aren’t pistachios red anymore? *
• Supersize me.
• Yes, I’ve Grown Accustomed to Her Face is a real song from the musical My Fair Lady.
• She said what?
• Evo just proves every week he’s not as smart as he looks.
• How do you answer your work line?
• Magnophobic Sheila
• Life is show prep
• Scott Sigler actually pays attention to my facebook crap?
• Dream science experts… not.
• Tweetsfortwats is losing it’s umph.  Tweetsforboobs on the other hand…
• Promo for JC Hutchins print debut of 7th Son: Descent.
• She’s an American Girl, or NJ is.
• Adam and Eve for everyone.
• Ideas for fucking with your friends.
• Possibility of me having a real Thanks for Giving.
• The Deadline.
• Coming soon: @MsInformation!

* Originally dye was applied by importers to hide stains on the shells caused when the nuts were picked by hand. Most pistachios are now picked by machine and the shells remain unstained, making dyeing unnecessary except to meet ingrained consumer expectations.

Podcast: Download (29.4MB)

I never know what to put here. We talk about empty nesting, pissing and snakes. And sexting. Are you any good at sexting, cuz I could use a few pointers.

Choice Bits

• Evo is finally getting his shit together at work.
• NJ has left the family home to go off to school… across town.
• “If you’re listening Son, don’t come home.”
• The grownups get their garage back.
• Chicks are moody bitches?
• I need to work on my sexting.
• Should we have a sex segment? A sexment?
• When you’re talking sex on twitter it’s called twatting.
• Evo’s tacky sound effects.
• Inglourious Basterds semi-discussion.
• Quentin Tarentino is dawg ugly but a brilliant movie maker.
• District 9 semi-discussion.
• “Stop fucking thinking about it. It was a movie about killin’ Natzies!”
• Halloween II?
• Zombieland. Sounds like fun!
• NJ says some movie is not really a chick flick but we don’t know which one it is.
• “We can just fuck all weekend.”
• “I don’t like having my weather with adjectives.”
• Ted Kennedy died.
• Hunchbacks pissing in a trough.
• More about outdoor urinals than you ever wanted to know.
• She’s not peeing in the pool.
• Promo for The Good Parts, an erotica podcast.
• We now have two snakes, Ares and Xena.
• The bell rang, we’re done.
• It doesn’t say Evo-Sheila-Debbie at 11.

(Well damnit, the actual media was there on the first save but somewhere in my editing it disappeared. Let’s try this again.)

****

Technical difficulties, just download THIS until smarter people than me can fix it.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 27:03 — 24.8MB)

Recorded on my birthday. What did you get me?

Choice Bits

• Math is hard

• Apologies for last week’s show.
• You fucked my day completely
• I’m trying to piss people off on purpose
• I spent the morning being lotioned-up by a 2 year old
• I look like Nappy Dan
• They call that David Attenborough Syndrome
• Into the Dark
• I plan on showing my ass again
• If there’s no drinking involved, we won’t do it for #evfn
• Vacation for Evo @ 11 crew coming up in July
• I’m pretty sure that precludes operating heavy machinery
• Wedge that thing right between your tits and you’ll be in the perfect spot
• That’s where the phrase “anal leakage” came from
• Would it be rude for me to say perhaps your daughter is in prostitution?
• She’s a pussy-enabler

Podcast: Download (Duration: 29:43 — 27.3MB)

Jack Hosley visits. And we’re too busy talking about heavy drinking to pay as much attention as we should. We suck at hosting people.

Choice Bits

• You were a lot drunk
• Shut the fuck up, woman
• Invite the wrong crowd and encourage them to do bad things
• Evocon (should really be ShEvo:con, I think)
• This is another story of my idiot son
• It’s illegal to drive down the road with the doors open on the van — while you’re drinking
• This is life lesson #242
• His wife is a useless princess
• I’m not touching my kid’s testicle
• Was it Twilight terrible?
• Debbie always falls for the dumpy guy
• WanderRadio.com
• You are a big ass
• None of her family listens to this show
• OK, have my empty can
  Sincere Driver Needed

• Ding.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 31:57 — 29.3MB)

Jeff Moriarty is here to make us all laugh and pimp Ignite Phoenix. Which is coming very soon! And Debbie sneaks in a promo for The Adventures of Indiana Jim.

Choice Bits

• Apologies for last week, which you’ll now as P.G. recaps

• Why the fuck don’t people listen to me?
• Even inanimate objects aren’t listening to you
• I think they feel bad because it got hit by a cement truck
• It doesn’t hurt that you’re really cute, too
• I don’t swear near enough to get on that motherfucking site
• “SEO” and “ebook” should be profanity on Twitter
• You’re such an evohole
• Wristwatch has “twat” in the middle
• Let me Google that for you
• He looks really uncomfortable with her hand up his ass
• When the cops stop you, don’t argue & don’t spit on them

More… »

Podcast: Download (Duration: 27:18 — 25.1MB)

Summary

Tyler Hurst joins the crew. And no, he wasn’t on before and no, we didn’t lose that interview? How do rumors like that get started?

Promo played for Geek Radio Daily

Choice Bits

• No animals were harmed in the making of this podcast

• Haven’t you ever had your hand on a teat?
• I almost pissed myself today
• She’s from the past
• What the fuck is crap, then?
• Cultural harassment charges would be coming up instantly
• God we talk about a lot of subjects we know shit about
• So religion is arbitrary? No!
• I’m not even Catholic and I know nuns aren’t supposed to do that
• You just ate Christ!
• “Jump on the helicopter” sounds like a creepy sexual position
• The prehensile penis comes around
• The only thing better would be running ahead of the hot chicks backwards

Detailed Show Notes

The Amish and their children. Do they have the same issues we do? Which spills over to a conversation of various odd religions.

Swahili curse confusion. If your not a native English speaker, you’ll be confused with which slang terms are OK and which are highly offensive. For the same stuff.

And strange as it may sound, we circle BACK to religion. Fucking broken record, that is us.

Oh, and we’re fucked on the party suite for Dragon*Con. If you can help… HELP! Cuz right now, we have no where to have the singular party we really need to have

Someone said we never talked about the antics of No Pants Day on the Light Rail in Phoenix. And since Tyler was there pantsless with us, now seems like a good time to talk about it.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 28:51 — 26.5MB)

Summary

Debbie’s old friend Wendy joins us for the show, where we bitch about the weather and shit stains.

Debbie slides in two promos: a corrected one for a serialized audiobook called Heart of the Hunter. And no, it isn’t available at Podiobooks.com. Yet. And then for The Scotch Cast. Which I was on. Which rocked the house!

Choice Bits

• I need a sleepover

• I’m thinking you’re going to have to show me your tits
• You must bring paper mache created items
• No skulls or wagon wheels
• We see the beads, panties & bra in the trees
• You hang out with this crazy bitch?
• I blame all of this on Scott Sigler
• YouTube is full of shit stains
• We haven’t actually been dick-hunting yet
• Our douchebag husbands were friends…
• I’d have been puking my guts out
• I bet you’re an even worse pilot
• We’re doing this again next week?

More… »

Podcast: Download (Duration: 24:06 — 22.1MB)

Summary

Scott Sigler joins the crew! The Future Dark Overlord himself! He’s doing a book tour for Contagious and rolled through Phoenix. This is probably the only interview he’ll be on where he doesn’t spend the whole time pimping his book.

Love the new intro! All hail Debbie, for she is the keeper of audio production for Evo at 11!

Choice Bits

• We have special fridge for beer like yours: it’s the “crap” fridge
• I got fucked by Audacity and I didn’t even cum
• That’s a lot of shackin’ going on
• I’m going to get the belt
• Satan’s 101 Ways to Manage Your Child
• I’m gonna get that damned belt if you don’t sit down (It went to 11)
• Do not piss in the corner of my living room (A perfect 10)
• So then I started swinging from Kansas
• She pulls out the The Damma Gelta Phi pledge paddle…
• He was poking holes in the roof of the rental car
• He threw a potato at him from across the room
• You got your face rubbed in piss?
• You have a mascot in the dining room that manages to offend two cultures at once
• I’m on day 1, got four hours of sleep, I can’t go wrong
• It’s just a romping good time in a horror flick
• There’s a lot of Roman numerals
• I hope his coffin is lined with real Corinthian leather
• You’re halfway to a great porno if you have a midget
• I’m kinda interested in the Total Hofomoration
• I’ve seen pictures of my cousin making a traveshamockery of himself
• Those are not inauguration parties, they are Scott Sigler preview parties
• It takes a hundred nos to get a ho

More… »

Podcast: Download (Duration: 28:15 — 25.9MB)

Tip from Evo: loads of links in this post. Uncover them for juicy photos.

Summary

We give poor Jack Mangan a hard time for wimping out and going to CopperCon while we had much more fun at Dragon*Con.

Choice Bits

• Jack Mangan or David Moldawer?

• Sexy, vampire novelist or sexy vampire novelist?
• You know what keeps Lou Ferrigno looking young? Gamma rays.
• Ringworm con!
• Tee Morris: “How many books can I sell before I get to the shower?”
• Guests with large upper body dimensions should not ride this ride.
• It was like “Killroy was here”, but with boobs.
• I can get you to feel me up any time.
• She said the “F” word. Probably not the “F” word you are thinking of.

More… »

Podcast: Download (Duration: 26:46 — 24.6MB)